My love affair with wikipedia.com continues to grow as I seem to spend more and more of my free time following twisting and turning paths of links from one subject to another. There seems to be no end in sight as I voraciously devour the information at my fingertips. I must have tons of bookmarks on subjects that I have not finished researching. Recently I was walking down the road of the Bhagavad Gita and I realized that one of the reasons for my stagnation of the past few years is that I lack passion in my life.
That is one of the reasons I need to get back to teaching as I knew that was my calling in life. But also, I don't feel the ups and downs of life as I once did. I have a balance and steadiness now that quite frankly bores me. I went out three times this past week and had alcohol, much to my regret. Not that I drank lots and lots, no just a few beers each time. Rather, I just end up feeling uneasy and "off." I have never been much of a drinker, I refused to drink until 21 and then did so for most of that year and then swore off alcohol for a couple years after that. I saw the effects of drugs/alcohol on some people I cared about and remembered why did not like to lose control or poison my body.
I think that I am now at that point again where I no longer with to dull my mind and poison my body. I have far too much work ahead of me. With all this expensive dental work I have been getting, I have begun to get back into working out and taking better care of my body. My sister has initiated a trip to India that will include herself and her husband as well as our father and me. I am pretty excited about it and have decided to brush up on my Indian history to better appreciate the visit. Also ordered some books on learning Hindi to make communication much easier.
I should be able to finish up school when I return and get everything set to go back to teaching by Fall of 2006. The lure of money and comfort still leads me to believe that I should stay in the corporate world and move up the ladder and jump to bigger and better companies. But all in all that would only provide me with temporary happiness by providing me enough money to afford distractions and entertainment. None of those things would help me help contribute to helping society progress as it should. Long ago I knew the path to take and I need to continue to work back to that path, though it may not be as comfortable and easy as the current path, I do know that the destination is a much more worthy place to be when the journey ends.