For some reason I have been blessed and cursed with having seen two women that moved into my top ten most beautiful women list. And just last Friday, I had luck turn my way for the first time in a very long time. As anyone who really knows me, hmmm does anyone really know me?...Well anyway, most people who know me know what a picky bastard I am when it comes to so many things. Especially women, which is semi-funny considering some of the choices I have made. But when taken in the context of going against my instincts as well as following my heart rather than my brain and eyes, it makes some sense that I could be so picky, yet make the decisions I have. So at the beginning of this year, I detailed my first sight of the year, a friend of my sister, who has a prior engagement. So that is out of the picture. But that still doesn't detract from being placed in my top ten list, one need not own or possess something to have it be appreciated. Then last month, I was in my car waiting to turn left into my office complex when I looked left and saw this young woman/girl shaking her head and singing and basically grooving out to whatever she was listening to. I laughed to myself, but I couldn't get a good look at her face, so I didn't think much of it. Then as I turned left, with our windows open, our faces were less than 3 feet apart, and we looked into each other's eyes. I was struck by her beauty and I am positive the look on my face let her know just what I thought. But they were not thoughts of lust, rather I felt rewarded with a vision of such spectacular and breathtaking beauty, that I could only feel a serene excitement wash over me. She met my gaze and I physically felt my heart jump in a way it has not in many many years.
I was of a mind to turn around, but it was too late. I should have stopped the car as I passed her and just got out, damn the cars behind me, and just asked her out. But all I could do was drive on and go into work to tell my tale to my friends at work, who not having my discerning tastes could not care one iota.

Then came last Friday.

When our office was in Irvine we used to have lunch about once a month or so at this local ethnic restaurant, which had the same name as one near our Costa Mesa location. But sometime during our time there, the Irvine restaurant changed their name. So we figured they must have either been of the same ownership and were sold off or else they were different owners and had copyright name issues. Well we kept going there and the one waitress they had was absolutely gorgeous as well as just having this super nice quality about her, I could see it in her eyes. Then about 7 or 8 months ago she wasn't there anymore. Even after our office moved, my buddy and I would still go there rather than the one in Costa Mesa even though it is closer. I argued that the food was better, but being a good friend he pretended to accept that argument. Though I still contest that the food is better and they do have slightly different menus.
At the beginning of that week I told a coworker about my tendency to wait in situations like that until windows of opportunity are lost. I related how I was very attracted to this waitress and how she no longer worked there. My coworker asked me why I never asked her out, but I just would feel like a jerk for asking someone out when they are at their job trying to earn a living. I wouldn't want my girlfriend bothered by guys all day, so I just figure its respectful to not bug someone like that. Not to mention I wouldn't be the first guy to ask her out. I dunno. My coworker and I discussed the whole ring thing. One of the first things I do is the ring check, see if they are married or have a promise ring.
My coworker told me that her friends go out and put rings on so they don't get bothered, which is funny because nice guys like me will look at that and then leave them alone. But the assholes out there will either not see it or just ignore it and bug them anyway. So it's pointless unless all women want is for jerks to ask them out.
Anyway, so time passes and last Friday my friend said he wanted to go there, I thought he meant the one in Irvine as he used that name. But he meant the one in Costa Mesa. I wasn't thrilled as I still held the food was better, but it wasn't worth it as my girl wasn't there anymore. So having given up, I didn't care. Well we saw the usual blonde stripper waitresses they have there. Seriously its like they hire women who are strippers, I haven't seen such selective hiring since Fuji's burgers near Goldenwest College in the early 90's.
It was a long wait so we seated ourselves and waited for service. As my friend and I were talking, out of the corner of my eye I saw a pair of jeans to my side and I turned and looked up so I could begin to order. Well as the buildup must have clued you in by now, yes, I looked up and saw her. I stared in shock and amazement and pointed at her and began to stammer as she said yes, she used to work at the other place and of course she recognized us. I was so speechless it was amazing.
Needless to say, I didn't say anything to her.
So stupid. Life gave me another chance, granted a chance to be rejected, but damn it, a chance to take a risk I was sorry I didn't take previously. I tell myself next time I go there, I will at least formally ask her name and make some small talk about seeing her there being a surprise.
But I also rationalize not doing so by saying it's busy and she has to work, or that she doesn't want to be bothered at work.

The only saving grace is that I am so picky, I'll find some fault of hers and feel much better about the whole thing.